Chit Chat

Dear sisters, I hope you are having a wonderful Tuesday!

I am sick and on my first day of vacation between my draining old job and the new one that's coming.

On Sunday at our support group meeting a topic came up on how to express painful emotions.

I am far from a master on the topic as I am known to be mostly dissociating in order not to feel sad, empty, lonely, disappointed or even angry and whatnot.

I thought I had nothing to offer to this topic when I remembered a trick of mine that is working since I was 13years old: music.

There is specifically one band that I listen to on repeat and loud, when the feelings are overwhelming andI have no control over them and I literally don't know what to do with myself, namely Portishead. Loved songs: the rip, sour times, wandering star, numb, roads, glory box, all mine and the list goes on.

Her voice is majestic, so powerful yet fragile, the music is ethereal (I am missing words to describe it), and Everytime it feels like the songs, the lyrics, her voice and the tunes are taking me in their hands, allowing me to feel my sadness or any other painful emotion to the fullest, cry my eyes out if needed, while I feel safe that nothing more than that is going to happen. It is the only way I can make the words "go through the sadness, let it wash over you and it will go away on its own" come true.

Extra tip: I am usually decluttering at the same time. Deep cleaning my bookcase or my bathroom, like getting rid of things that I don't need anymore literally and figuratively at the same time.

In between songs I just lay on the floor and listen to the lyrics as if my own sadness is speaking out.

I was asked to share my little trick in case it is useful.

I know I would love to learn some new tricks (me the old dog).

Thank you for your invaluable time!

Bis hugs to everyone of you and all my love 😚💞🫂